Dr. Sadie Allison’s .Passion-Enhancing 10-Step

Step 1: Show More AppreciationHow easily we forget all the little things that enhance romance. Try getting back to basics: hugs, kisses, massages. In a word, touch! Listen more, talk less and laugh together like there’s no tomorrow by reminiscing about fun times together. Team up to close any gaps that may have come between you, both physically and mentally.
Step 2: Shape UpPresent yourself to your partner as a lover-reborn. Shave down the stubbles, groom the pubes, shower with a sexy new soap, spend extra time flossing and brushing. Stretch and exercise—get your body in shape for a passion workout. And tone your pelvic muscles for sex. The exercise is called Kegels—and it’s effective for women AND men!
Step 3: Initiate IntimacyThe pace of modern life can make the bedroom a place that’s for sleeping only. Promise to revive sex in your relationship by talking about it, setting aside time for erotic playdates, finding new “tools” to get you in the mood , spring for a babysitter or hotel room, or bring back the ol’ bathroom quickie!
Step 4: Widen Your HorizonsVow to be open to new experiences. Relax any emotional and sexual hang-ups, and ease into new territory with the help of your understanding partner. Stimulate the senses of scent, touch, sight and sound. Communicate verbally and non-verbally. Bring your libido back on-line with gentle experimentation, and break out of stale habits.
Step 5: Share The LovemakingHave you become a selfish lover, taking more than you give? Don’t you know that the more you give, the more you get? Try it! Your new attitude will actually tip the balance the way you want it. Just give it a little time.
Step 6: Try One-Way PleasureSet aside a night where you are 100 percent dedicated to pleasing your partner. Fully engage yourself—body, mind and soul—and take your time to be a selfless and generous lover. All the pleasure flows from you, with no pressure on your partner to even try to please you back. Until next time, that is, when you switch roles and become the pleasure receiver! Ladies, all my best moves and techniques for pleasing him, are in my book Tickle his Pickle.
Step 7: Go Pleasure Yourself!Regularly! Just because your lover’s too busy when you’re horny doesn’t mean you must go without. And if you’re single, celibate, or temporarily solo, don’t deny yourself the orgasms you deserve. There are plenty of options to try on your own, or find some new inspirations in my female self-pleasure book,Tickle your Fancy!
Step 8: Become 5 Times BetterDecide to learn five new sex techniques in the coming year. They can be positions, role-plays, sextoy techniques, sexy talk. Try some of the things your lover has been begging you to do—then reverse roles and let the fun begin.
Step 9: Fill Your Pleasure ChestWhat’s waiting for you in YOUR nightstand? If it’s just an age-old vibrator with leaky batteries, it’s time to stock up with something new! Have you seen what’s available now? Toys, books, games and pleasure kits beyond your wildest imagination. Step 10: Speak Up!You have the power to turn this year’s Valentine’s Day into a personal sexual renaissance. Stop accepting a low-energy or nonexistent sex life, and revive what’s rightfully yours. Use all the resources at your command: self-help books, website information, medical solutions and professional counseling. It’s your life, and you only live it once. Why not love it, too?
Dr Sadie Allison is bestselling author and licensed doctor of Human Sexuality. She’s a member of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors & Therapists (AASECT) and is founder and Kitty-In-Chief of Tickle Kitty, Inc. Dr. Sadie was born, raised, and still lives in the city by the bay, and spends her days writing, jogging across the Golden Gate Bridge and raising her beautiful daughter, Sienna.


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